Are you challenged in your parenting? Are you repeatedly emotionally triggered? Are you caught in cycles of chaos and conflict with your child?
Have you tried lots of different parenting strategies, but found that nothing seems to work?
As a parent - despite all your knowledge, awareness and good intentions - do you struggle with seemingly unsolvable challenges behind closed doors?
Every parent knows there are moments when you just snap. You’re tired, busy or overwhelmed, and you react instead of responding. You find yourself saying and doing things that you promised yourself you would never do.
You can probably recall moments when you were horrified by your reaction, or when you heard yourself use the same tone of voice that your parents used. There may be times when you’ve shouted or lashed out, and - from the look on your child’s face - you can see that you hurt their feelings, and you’re sure you are damaging your child’s spirit.
Most of the time, you can find healthy solutions to your parenting challenges by consulting books, talking to friends and relatives, or taking a class. Most of the time, you are confident, and you trust that your positive parenting strategies will help you cope with your child’s changing moods and behaviours.
But right now, you may feel like you have all the knowledge, intentions and strategies but you’re still reacting repeatedly in ways that make you ache with remorse and challenge your view of who you are as a parent.
You may start to feel as if you just aren’t cut out to be a parent, as if you’re damaging your child in some way, and as if you’re just not good enough.
In truth, these horrible, messy triggers are not signs that you’re a bad parent, or that there is something wrong with your child. They’re just the products of unconsciousness patterns from the past.
You learn how to parent from the way you were parented. Even if you have made conscious decisions to parent in a particular way, stories from your past and childhood conditioning will shape the way you perceive the world, yourself and your value.
When you react to your child in negative, angry or hurtful ways, you are really reacting to unresolved emotional needs from your own attachment history. If you are unaware of the reason why your reaction is so intense and out of control, you may judge yourself harshly.
These ‘sore spots’ are an opportunity to look at your ‘emotional inheritance’.
Together, we can work with these challenges so you expand and evolve beyond the scripts of your childhood. When you step back and examine your inner reality and the models you learned, you can release the limiting stories about who you are.
I will support you to work with your ‘Inner Child’ before we address the behaviour of the real child in front of you. Together, we will find the gap between reacting and responding.
When you know what is causing your reaction, you’ll have a better understanding of what you want to create with your child, and you’ll be able to connect from a place of deeper empathy and compassion for their needs.
- A safe, confidential and loving space in which to explore the parent/child dynamic
- Help as you come to understand why you may react the way you do (your emotional triggers) and develop empathy and compassion for yourself and your unique parenting challenges
- Help as you become aware of and release negative unconscious cycles that keep you stuck, so you can restore connection with your child and change the patterns of interaction
- Empowerment so you can build a connected, reciprocal relationship with your child so that they feel seen, heard, understood and valued for their essential nature
- Help as you learn tools to communicate effectively with your child when they are emotionally triggered so they feel safe and held and learn to build emotional intelligence and resiliency
- Training to help you learn how to set boundaries in a calm, confident and clear way and build your child’s sense of self-responsibility and self-discipline
Journey to Wholeness offers a unique blend of Nicki Anderson’s knowledge and her years of experience working with children and families struggling with emotional issues and trauma as a therapist in Child and Family Mental Health.
An Occupational Therapist, a Jungian Life Coach and a WAVE Process® Certified Practitioner, Nicki has also studied Family Therapy, Developmental Psychology, Transpersonal Psychology and Jungian Psychology. She has a special interest in attachment theory and practice. She was an attachment parent to her two children, and an avid advocate of conscious parenting.
You can read more about Nicki here
Contact Nicki at firstname.lastname@example.org for a complimentary introductory session.